Theme: Five Firsts: First Love
Disclaimer: ATs belongs to Joss Whedon and company.
Author's Notes: Set in between Seasons One and Two of ATS
She had been nervous when their kissing had led to something more. Primarily because she was afraid of what would happen when they had sex. Cordelia didn’t want to be the one who was responsible for unleashing Angelus onto the world again. Yet at the same time she was afraid of what it could mean if she didn’t give Angel that perfect moment of happiness when he would lose his soul. She was afraid of not measuring up to Buffy and somehow being found less in his eyes than the perfect blonde Slayer.
Yet as they lay beside one another, Cordelia felt a sense of contentment spread over her. She might not have given him that perfect moment of happiness, something that she was grateful for, but she knew that he had enjoyed things. For once in her life, she wasn’t going to have to live up to some ideal that the other person had fallen in love with. As Angel rolled over and pulled her into his arms, Cordelia knew that it didn’t matter that she wasn’t his soul mate. What they had was something better than what Angel had had with Buffy. Together, they could both be themselves and just be happy with one another.
“You’re thinking way too much about something,” Angel sleepily stated as he nibbled at her neck.
”Just thinking about how it was fortunate for me to run into you at that party.”
”No you weren’t,” Angel said.
”And how do you know?”
”Your muscles are all tense and you’re worrying about something. If you were thinking about how we met, you’d be more relaxed.”
”Oh,” Cordelia replied.
“I am not about to leave you and run back to Sunnydale if that’s what you’re worrying about.”
”Cordelia, don’t lie. I have everything that I could possibly want right here in my arms.”
As he moved over her to place a kiss on her lips, Cordelia blushed at his words. Somehow Angel always seemed to know what she was thinking, especially when she was thinking about his past in Sunnydale. She was relieved at his words so she put her fears and doubts behind her and focused on the man who was with her, where he wanted to be.